{"id":1021,"date":"2010-11-23T09:00:42","date_gmt":"2010-11-23T09:00:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.badreputation.org.uk\/?p=1021"},"modified":"2013-05-31T16:56:42","modified_gmt":"2013-05-31T15:56:42","slug":"at-the-movies-red","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/badreputation.org.uk\/2010\/11\/23\/at-the-movies-red\/","title":{"rendered":"At The Movies: RED"},"content":{"rendered":"
There are two things I want to get out of the way before I start telling you about the film today.\u00a0 Firstly:<\/p>\n
*** There are spoilers in this!***<\/strong><\/p>\n
Oh man.\u00a0 Three things, then.\u00a0
Three<\/em> things.\u00a0
Second <\/em>thing is, I am a dangerously massive fanboy for Warren
Ellis.\u00a0 I don’t really like going into a film already
biased either for or against its artistic merits, but I was
practically eating my own face with anticipation for this one.<\/p>\n
And thirdly, I am also madly in love with Helen Mirren and Morgan
Freeman.\u00a0 Helen Mirren is so badass I don’t know if I
want to be her best friend or be her.\u00a0 Morgan Freeman’s
voice alone turns me into a glowing pillar of delight.\u00a0 The
mere fact that they are near each other, in the same shot sometimes,
in
RED <\/strong>(they’re on the poster!\u00a0 Both of
them!\u00a0 Simultaneously!) is like cinematographical manna from
heaven being fed directly into my brain through a
glee tube<\/em>.<\/p>\n
So please remember that this film was seen through the eyes of
what was basically a person fully transformed into a ziggurat
of pure fandom; an obelisk of moist-eyed admiration.\u00a0
Consequently, any words that have issued from my fingers as I
type this have been vetted for inappropriate levels of fanboy,
but I can’t promise that I’ll have caught all of
them.\u00a0 I can promise, however, that I have done my
best.<\/p>\n
But first off – and I’d really like to get this
out of the way, because I think we all noticed it,
didn’t we – there’s one scene that made me
actually shout “NO!” in the cinema and made people
look at me in disgust (sorry, Vue Cambridge!).<\/p>\n
Okay.\u00a0 The scene is this: Helen Mirren’s character,
Victoria, gets shot in the abdomen in such a way that she
genuinely thinks her life is at stake, and she prepares for a
final showdown, unarmed and bleeding from the gut, and then! a
man saves her.\u00a0 He literally sweeps her off her
combat-booted feet and whisks her off to safety.<\/p>\n
This is a clich\u00e9 that we have ingrained into our social
consciousness as thoroughly and as needlessly fictionally as
“frogs turn into princes when adequately
tongued.”\u00a0 “Woman cannot save self; man saves
woman.”\u00a0 At least the frog-kissing trope
doesn’t then translate across into how people commonly
regard frogs.\u00a0 But this “women are crap and need
saving” bollocks translates, doesn’t it?\u00a0 You
get it everywhere, from fairytales to adverts; this pointless,
condescending infantilism.\u00a0 This is a point at which I
would like to refer you to Bill Bailey’s magnificent “Beautiful Ladies”<\/a> song,
which tears the piss out of this trope perfectly.<\/p>\n
Beautiful ladies, in emergency situations!
The most aggravating thing about it is that – well,
okay, some viewers may find that it made the re-emergence of
this clich\u00e9
less annoying<\/em> – Helen Mirren kicks fourteen
types of arse in this.\u00a0 She has a free-mounted
machine gun.\u00a0 She blasts her way through waves of
drones with John Malkovich meekly in the background
handing her more guns.\u00a0 She explicitly changes out of
her heels into a nice pair of combat boots to handle the
violence.\u00a0 She knows surgery and hides guns under
flower-arranging.\u00a0 So, for me, to have her punctured
and enlimpened like a party balloon just made me want to
cry.<\/p>\n
\nBeautiful ladies are lovely, but sometimes they
don’t take care
\nThey’re too busy with
their makeup, or combing their lovely hair
\nTo take
basic safety precautions.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n